What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

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Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

As an inmate did you have to live alongside a bully for your whole sentence?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

What are scads fish? What types are there?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

TEXT:

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

What happens psychologically to a man the first time he gets penetrated anally?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Why do gun lovers think their right to own a weapon supercedes everyone else's right to be safe and not be shot?

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

How much higher are McDonald's prices going to go?

Make Nazis afraid again!

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

What life lesson did you learn the hard way?

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

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¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

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Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Is it common for female doctors to examine male patients without another nurse present? Is there a difference in protocol for nurses and physician assistants?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

At least until the peyote kicks in ...